091112

It's the holidays again!!! That means I'll be blogging more now haha...School ended today and this is pretty much how it went this year... (Warning~ Emo post :P)

2012...
This year is definitely the most memorable one so far... I spent my time with them. I played with them. I laughed so much but ended up in a slump because of all the wrongs I've done... I've let my friends down and it's like this now. There's no one else to blame but myself. Looking back, there really were lots of ups and downs.

How many times have I tried to escape from reality and lived in the virtual world? I've lost count. Now, I'm repeating what I've said the year before and the year before that. When can I snap out of it? It's a dumb question and most of you guys who read this will of course say, "if you have the heart to do it then you can do it." It's hard to break out of it since I'm so attached to it... These stuff were there for me whenever I needed it but sadly, it drove me away from the real world. Ironic how it's supporting me yet killing me at the same time.

Next year I'll be in Form 5, the time to grow up is finally here. Lots of thinking to be done.Dream or future? People advice me to follow my dreams but how can one do it when the people who love you, the people who watched over you, will be hurt by your actions.

The future I see is now all white. Like a piece of paper. It's blank. I've got all the colours of paint and different sizes of brushes in my hands. It's up to me to paint the future I want. But, I'm too afraid to even draw a dot on it. Cause the future I have in mind right now is bound to hurt almost everyone I know.